Zanne and I have been planning an August relocation to Vancouver. Why Vancouver? Because I lived there a few years ago (and loved it!) and always planned to return. When Zanne and I met, we had both recently returned from travelling. Zanne lived in London for 18 months and when I shared my Vancouver plans she noted North America was next on her “to do” list; Vancouver became a plan for us both. This week though Zanne has voiced some concerns about the Vancouver plan, which is a totally reasonable thing to do, but as a result I can’t help question whether my enthusiasm for Vancouver has pressured Zanne to assume my dream? This would be bad.
Lately, it would seem a combination of the current economy and the place we are at in our lives and our relationship have inspired feelings of “settling down” (buying a home and having a family ie living the Australian Dream). Which brings me to Zanne's said concerns. Her concerns are legitimate: at the moment we each have secure, reasonably paid jobs (in fact Zanne has a real career!), we have a car, we have savings, we have our family and friends close by and we could be in a great position in two or three years to buy a home and start a family. We are safe in Brisbane.
In comparison, Vancouver is a big risk: we might have problems getting jobs, housing, visas, making friends, etc – all common problems associated with travelling. We could honestly end up back in Brisbane without any savings or a car or a home and have to start from scratch again. Alternatively, Vancouver could be our greatest adventure! And, for some reason, I have an overwhelmingly feeling that we're going to be ok. Feelings aren’t facts though, and if we were to return to Brisbane with nothing we would be even more years away from a home and family. This, also, would be bad.
The bottom line for me is: I would regret us not going to Vancouver. I can see us happy there. I can see us there for years, having children there even. Vancouver is a beautiful city, I connect with its vibe and its people, and I know Zanne will too. In addition, we would have access to civil rights in Canada that we don’t have here (eg. marriage, parenting). My year in Vancouver was one of my best, but (in the spirit of this blog full of questions) what if Vancouver isn’t as great the second time round? Again, bad. My counter argument could be that we’re young and still have time to mess up and bounce back again, but I know this won’t fly with Zanne. My compromise is, a month in Vancouver before returning to Brisbane for the home and family.
So anyways, Zanne came home last night and said she was done with worrying, she doesn’t want to “be safe”, she wants the Vancouver plan. I can’t help wonder now though: are we doing the right thing? Only time will tell I suppose.
Shan
Lately, it would seem a combination of the current economy and the place we are at in our lives and our relationship have inspired feelings of “settling down” (buying a home and having a family ie living the Australian Dream). Which brings me to Zanne's said concerns. Her concerns are legitimate: at the moment we each have secure, reasonably paid jobs (in fact Zanne has a real career!), we have a car, we have savings, we have our family and friends close by and we could be in a great position in two or three years to buy a home and start a family. We are safe in Brisbane.
In comparison, Vancouver is a big risk: we might have problems getting jobs, housing, visas, making friends, etc – all common problems associated with travelling. We could honestly end up back in Brisbane without any savings or a car or a home and have to start from scratch again. Alternatively, Vancouver could be our greatest adventure! And, for some reason, I have an overwhelmingly feeling that we're going to be ok. Feelings aren’t facts though, and if we were to return to Brisbane with nothing we would be even more years away from a home and family. This, also, would be bad.
The bottom line for me is: I would regret us not going to Vancouver. I can see us happy there. I can see us there for years, having children there even. Vancouver is a beautiful city, I connect with its vibe and its people, and I know Zanne will too. In addition, we would have access to civil rights in Canada that we don’t have here (eg. marriage, parenting). My year in Vancouver was one of my best, but (in the spirit of this blog full of questions) what if Vancouver isn’t as great the second time round? Again, bad. My counter argument could be that we’re young and still have time to mess up and bounce back again, but I know this won’t fly with Zanne. My compromise is, a month in Vancouver before returning to Brisbane for the home and family.
So anyways, Zanne came home last night and said she was done with worrying, she doesn’t want to “be safe”, she wants the Vancouver plan. I can’t help wonder now though: are we doing the right thing? Only time will tell I suppose.
Shan
If it's the right thing than everything will just fall into place. My only advice is to don't burn your bridges at your current jobs just in case you need to return. Good Luck in no matter what your decision!
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